"I said good day!"

Fez

Jackie: Michael, who is this guy?
Kelso: Oh, that's Fez. He's a foreign exchange student.
Jackie: What'd we exchange for him?
Pilot

In the school cafeteria:
Fez: All this food for 45 cents. It is unbelievable. (He tastes it. Then he puts his fork down.) Oh, I see.
Streaking

Hyde: Oh, and I could write some really great slogan like "I hate the fuzz" on my ass!
Fez: If you hate the fuzz on your ass, well then you just shave it off.
Streaking

Fez: Please stop touching each other. It gives me needs.
Eric's Burger Job

Fez: you know in my country--
Hyde: It's illegal here.
Fez: Oh, I see.
Eric's Burger Job

Fez: Don't resist me, mama! It's boogie time!
That Disco Episode

Fez: My gosh, Buddy, with a car like that, you must be knee deep in whores.
Eric's Buddy

Watching Gilligan's Island:
Fez: Hey, they're finally getting off the island!
Eric: No, Fez, they're not getting off the island.
Fez: But they have a clock and a radio. What could go wrong?
Eric's Buddy

Fez, discovering Amaretto: Yum. Liquid candy.
The Ski Trip

Eric: Donna and I could go--
Fez: To the prom!
Eric: No, Fez. All the way.
Fez: All the way. To the prom!
The Prom

Fez on his English teacher: She's always writing sexy comments on my homework. "Nice job." "Good effort." "See me."
The Prom

Fez: I am so excited about Star Whores.
Hyde: Fezzy, man, Star Wars.
Fez: Screw that.
A New Hope

Fez: Ah, they have finally left. Now it's just the three of us.
Eric: That's great, Fez.
Fez: Oh, I get it. If I was gone you two would kiss. Ah, life's a bitch, huh?
A New Hope

Fez: Every day I am here with my heart on my sleeve, hoping only for friendship and acceptance. And what do I get? Abandonment. Loneliness. When is it Fez's turn? Where is my whore??
Punk Chick

Fez: An apple? Where’s my candy, you son of a bitch?
Halloween

Fez: Look at this debauchery. This is the smelly underside of a once great nation. (He pauses.) Ooh, yum! Candy apples!
Vanstock

Fez: Could you send your best wine to Caroline, and tell her when I said "hi" I meant "I'll take you like a stallion."
Dine and Dash

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