You did it, you killed me. Still won't help your boy...

Graduation Day

Cordelia: I can't believe this loser look. I lobbied so hard for the teal. No one ever listens to me. A lone fashionable wolf.
Xander: I like the Maroon. Has more dignity.
Cordelia: Dignity? You? In relation to clothes? I am awash in a sea of confusion.

Cordelia: Wow, you've really mastered the power of positive giving-up.
Xander: I've been lucky too many times. My number's coming up. And I was short! One more rotation and I'm shipping state-side, you know what I mean?
Cordelia: Seldom if ever.

Willow: Oh, I'm gonna miss her.
Buffy: Don't you hate her?
Willow: Yes, with a fiery vengeance. She picked on me for ten years, the vacuous tramp. It's like a sickness, Buffy. I'm just missing everything. I miss P.E.
Buffy: I think it's contagious. The whole senior class has turned into the Sixties, or what I would have imagined the Sixties would have been like without the war and the hairy armpits.
Willow: You don't feel it?
Buffy: No, I don't. I guess I'll miss stuff, but I just don't get the whole graduation thing. I mean you get a piece of paper and nothing changes. I don't even think I'm gonna go.
Willow: Old trusty soda machine. I push you for root beer, you give me Coke.

Faith: Sorry, friend, boss wants you dead.
Professor Wirth: Why?
Faith, stabbing him: You know, I never thought to ask.

Percy: Hey, listen. Thank you. I mean, for helping me. Being so patient. And also, for not kicking my ass like you did in the Bronze.
Willow: You know, Percy, that was actually... for your own good.

Anya: So, I was wondering, maybe if you were free this weekend, maybe we could do some entertaining thing.
Xander: Would that be along the lines of you telling me about all the men you destroyed back in your demon days? Cause pencil me in.
Anya: Well, we could do something else you like. We could watch sports of some kind.
Xander: Uh, I don't know.
Anya: Men like sports. I'm sure of it.
Xander: Yes. Men like sports. Men watch the action move, they eat of the beef, and enjoy to look at the bosoms. A thousand years of avenging our wrongs and that's all you've learned?

Wesley: Everybody does seem to be going a bit mad, lately. Faith has something of a head start.

Buffy: The Mayor's trying to hide. I say we go seek.
Wesley: Ah. By attempting to keep a valuable clue from us, the Mayor may have inadvertently led us right to it!
Buffy: What page are you on, Wes, 'cause we already got there.
Wesley: Yes, well. You will go tonight. Look over his apartment. Anything of note, report back here.
Buffy: I just love it when you take charge, you man, you.
Wesley: Uh, we... was that a yes? I have trouble keeping track.

Giles: Nonetheless, keep watch. Faith has you at a disadvantage, Buffy.
Buffy: 'Cause I'm not crazy or cause I don't kill people?
Giles: Both, actually.

Willow: How come evil girl's in the mix?
Giles: Anya witnessed an Ascension.
Willow: Oh, okay then.

Mayor: So, this is the inner sanctum. Faith tells me this is where you folks like to hang out, concoct your little schemes. I tell you, it's just nice to see that some young people are still interested in reading in this modern era. So, what are kids reading nowadays? "The beast will walk upon the earth and darkness will follow. The several races of man will be as one in their terror and destruction." Aw, that's kind of sweet. Different races coming together.
Buffy: You never get even a little tired of hearing yourself speak, do you?
Mayor: That's one spunky little girl you've raised. I'm gonna eat her.

Cordelia: What's her saga?
Xander: She's freaking.
Cordelia: About what?
Xander: The Mayor is going to kill us all during graduation.
Cordelia: Oh. Are you going to go to fifth period?
Xander: I'm thinking I might skip it.
Cordelia: Me too.

Oz: Would it help if I panic?
Willow: Yes, it would be swell. Panic is a thing people can share in times of crisis. And everything's really scary now, you know, and I don't know what's gonna happen. And there's all sorts of things that you're supposed to get to do after high school, and I was really looking forward to doing them, and now we're probably just gonna die and I would like to feel that maybe you would... (Oz kisses her) ... What are you doing?
Oz: Panicking.

Buffy to Angel: I know, world in peril and we have to work together. This is my last office romance, I'll tell you that.

Anya: When I think that something could happen to you, it feels bad inside, like I might vomit.
Xander: Welcome to the world of romance.
Anya: It's horrible. No wonder I used to get so much work.
Xander: Well, I'm sorry I give you barfy feelings.
Anya: Come with me.
Xander: I can't.
Anya: Why not?
Xander: I got friends on the line.
Anya: So?
Xander: That humanity thing's still a work in progess, isn't it?
Anya: Are you really going to be that much help to them? I mean, you'll probably just get in the way.
Xander: Your stock is plummeting here, sweetheart.
Anya: Fine! You know what? I hope you die. (Xander walks off) Aren't we gonna kiss?

Wesley: The Council's orders are to concentrate on...
Buffy: Orders? I don't think I'm gonna be taking any more orders. Not from you, not from them.
Wesley: You can't turn your back on the Council.
Buffy: They're in England. I don't think they can tell which way my back is facing.

Buffy: I have a strategy. You're not in it.
Wesley: This is mutiny.
Buffy: I like to think of it as graduation.

Wesley: Buffy, you don't know what you're doing.
Buffy: Get a job.

Buffy: There's a cure.
Faith: Damn. What is it?
Buffy: Your blood. As justice goes, it's not un-poetic, don't you think?

Faith: Well, look at you. All dressed up in big sister's clothes.
Buffy: You told me I was just like you. That I was holding it in.

Mayor, eating spiders: Mmm. My God, what a feeling. The power of these creatures. It suffuses my being. I can feel the changes begin. My organs are shifting, changing, making ready for the Ascension. Plus these babies are high in fiber. And what's the fun in becoming an immortal demon if you're not regular, am I right?

Faith: You did it. You killed me. Still won't help your boy, though. Shoulda been there, B, quite a ride.

Xander, giving Giles coffee: Aren't you supposed to be drinking tea anyway?
Giles: Tea is soothing. I wish to be tense.
Xander: Okay. But you are destroying a perfectly good cultural stereotype here

Cordelia: But he's her Watcher.
Giles: Buffy no longer needs a Watcher.
Cordelia: Well, does he have to leave the country? I mean, you got fired, and you still hang around like a big loser. Why can't he?

Buffy: It'll save you.
Angel: It'll kill you.
Buffy: Maybe not. Not if you don't take it all.

Mayor: Murderous little fiend! Did you see what she did to my Faith?
Angel: Hadn't any plans to weep over that one.
Mayor: Well, I'd get set for some weeping if I were you. I'd get set for a world of pain! Misery loves company, young man, and I'm looking to share that with you and your whore!

Xander to Angel: Well, its just good to know that when the chips are down and things look grim you'll feed off the girl who loves you to save your own ass!

Buffy: So, am I crazy?
Willow: Well, crazy is such a strong word.
Giles: Let's not rule it out though.

Cordelia: I personally don't think it's impossible to come up with a crazier plan.
Oz: We attack the Mayor with hummus.
Cordelia: I stand corrected.

Oz: Is there something that he's afraid of?
Angel: Well, he's not crazy about germs.
Cordelia: Of course, that's it. We attack him with germs!
Buffy: Great! We'll corner him and then you can sneeze on him.
Cordelia: No! No, we'll get a box with the Ebola virus and... and... Or it doesn't even have to be real, we can just get a box that says "Ebola" on it and... um, chase him with the box.
Xander: I'm starting to lean towards the humus offensive.

Angel: Faith.
Buffy: Faith?
Angel: At the hospital he was grieving. Seriously crazed, and not just in a homicidal "I want to be a demon" way. She is his weak link.

Wesley: So there is something I can do, besides scream like a woman?

Mayor to his vampires: Remember: fast and brutal. It's going to be a whole new world come nightfall, don't want to weaken now. And boys? - Let's watch the swearing.

Wesley: With Buffy no longer working for the council, there really is no place for me here.
Cordelia: I guess not.
Wesley: No reason to stay.
Cordelia: No.
Wesley: No. No cause to hope that... I might be needed?
Cordelia: Needed?
Wesley: Or... wanted?
Cordelia: Wanted...

Angel: I'm not going to say good-bye. If we get through this, I'm just going to go. You understand?

Snyder at the podium: Congratulations to the class of 1999. You all proved more or less adequate. This is a time of celebration, so sit still and be quiet. Spit out that gum. Please welcome our distinguished guest speaker: Richard Wilkins the Third. I saw that gesture. You see me after graduation.

Mayor: Well. What a day this is! Special day. Today is our centennial, the one hundredth anniversary of the founding of Sunnydale, and I know what that means to all you kids: not a darn thing. Because today something much more important happens: today you all graduate from high school. Today all the pain, all the work, all the excitement is finally over. And what's a hundred years of history compared to that?

Snyder: This is simply unacceptable! This is not orderly. This is not discipline! You're on my campus buddy! And when I say I want quiet, I want... (is eaten)

Buffy: Hey! (holds Faith's knife in her right hand) You remember this? I took it from Faith. Stuck it in her gut. Just slid in her like she was butter. You want to get it back from me... Dick?

Wesley: If I could just get something for the pain. It's rather a lot of pain, actually. Aspirin? If you would... Perhaps I could just be knocked unconscious.

Buffy: I haven't processed everything yet. My brain isn't really functioning on the higher levels. It's pretty much "fire bad, tree pretty."

Cordelia: Well, that’s the most fun you can have without having any fun.

Buffy: If someone could just wake me when it's time to go to college, that'd be great.
Oz: Guys, take a moment to deal with this: - we survived.
Buffy: It was a hell of a battle!
Oz: Not the battle - high school.