Most of these quotes don't appear on the season section under their appropriate episode - just here!

Martin: For God's sake, Frasier, you're forty-one years old - it's time you learned something. The system ain't perfect - sometimes the bad guy wins. And all those things you thought would be around to help you, the courts and the police department - well, sometimes, they're just not there when you need them, so you can let it eat a hole in your stomach or you can just file it away under the heading "Sometimes life sucks."
Frasier: Yeah, well, that file's getting pretty thick!
The Crucible

Niles: Those were awful, those family driving vacations. Dad insisting on covering as many miles as possible in a day; the two of us, tiny hostages in the back seat, clutching our car sickness bags, straining to see something out of the window as the landscape whizzed by. I was 13 before I realized cows aren't blurry.
Travels with Martin

Niles: Good golly, I'm inspired. I'm going to put on a baseball cap.
Travels with Martin

Frasier: Niles... I've just had an epiphany.
Niles: Oh wonderful, we could use a second sentence.
Author, Author

Niles: I was practicing my Tai Chi this morning, and I accidentally kicked him into the reflecting pool. That's when I brought him inside and left him by the hearth to dry.
Frasier: He caught fire?
Niles: I was not as careless as it seems. After all, a real child would have cried before it burst into flames!
Flour Child

Niles, smoking a cigar and playing the piano: This is really what men do, isn't it, Dad?
Martin: Yeah - this and some things outdoors, but we'll just stick to this for now.
Adventures in Paradise

Frasier: You know the expression "Living well is the best revenge"?
Niles: Wonderful expression. I just don't know how true it is, you don't see it turning up in a lot of opera plots. "Ludwig, maddened by the poisoning of his entire family, wreaked vengeance on Gunther in the third act by living well."
Seat of Power

Niles: That hooligan is pelting me with peanuts! And look at that tray, he's come prepared!
Retirement is Murder

Niles: I just got in the car and started driving.
Frasier: Well, I'm glad you ended up here.
Niles: Actually, I ended up at the Oregon border-check. I had fruit in the car so I had to turn back.
An Affair to Forget

Niles: Nineteen floors down to my car! Garage door's electric! Can't open! Twenty floors back up! Lost count! Bad lady upstairs! Big dog! Need place to die!
Dark Victory

Frasier: It's over! Sing, fat lady, sing!
Kisses Sweeter than Wine

Niles: And I stormed out and slammed the door! Of course, it was that fourteenth century Bavarian cathedral door, so I had to get two of the servants to help me, but what it lacked in spontanaity it made up for in resonance.
The Last Time I saw Maris

Niles reads from his journal: "Awake five am. Blissful confusion. Something's happened, but what? 5:01. Ah yes. An overwhelming sense of emptiness and despair. 5:07" - it's hard to read. Oh right - Wept uncontrollably. 6:18. All cried out, hungry now, ate entire box of Frosted Flakes, they're grrrr-eat!" So don't you tell me I'm not in touch with my emotions!
The Last Time I saw Maris

Waitress: There's a man over there who says he's waiting for you.
Niles: Ah. No doubt the much ballyhooed Bob.
The Friend

Niles, on dancing: This is boring, yet difficult.
Moon Dance

Frasier: I'm looking for "How Green was My Valley."
Video store clerk: Huh?
Frasier: It is a beautifully-acted depiction of life in a small town in Wales. It won five Academy Awards. It's a classic!
Clerk: Oh. Well, this is a shot in the dark, but you might try looking in the "Classics" section.
High Crane Drifter

Frasier: Excuse me, is there another copy?
Clerk: Oh yeah, that'd be across the street in our "How Green was My Valley" Annex.
High Crane Drifter

Frasier: It's just, the whole thing just catapults me back to high school - you only know me as an adult, but back then I was a rather unathletic bookish sort.
Roz: Get out.
Frasier: Jocks were the bane of my existence. They'd always call me a weinie and steal all the girls that I wanted.
Roz: Oh, Frasier, you must have had some girlfriends.
Frasier: Friends! Yeah, every time they wanted a sensitive shoulder to cry on. Then some block-headed pillar of testosterone would come by and it was "Bye bye Frasier, we'll study later!" I'd head home to Niles, and we'd put on the Brandenburg Concerto as we played air violin.
Love Bites Dog

(Daphne makes Martin read from her book, and he becomes very uncomfortable with what he's reading.)
Martin: "'You fool!' she whispered again. 'You sweet, brave, wonderful fool! I should have died had you not found my bedchamber!'" Oh jeez. "Then she was in his arms and all her qualms forgotten, as she ... tore his tunic asunder and thrust her ... eager lips against the sinews of his naked chest ... (turns pages) The next morning--"
Daphne: You left out a section!
Martin: Okay, okay. "As his brazen fingers peeled the silken fabric from her ... heaving (ahem) bosoms ..." (takes a swig of beer) "He beheld her quivering alabaster mounds ..." (wipes forehead) "... At that moment she felt the proof of his rampant passion against her milky thighs...?? His almost Godlike beauty" (checking to see if Daphne is still awake) "was marred only by the fact that he was ..." (sees that she is asleep) cross-eyed, three feet tall and had breath like owl droppings.
Four for the Seesaw

Niles: At the Shangri-La, the highlight of my day is getting out of bed, so I can slam it back into the wall!
Taps at the Montana