Jennifer: Herb finally got a sponser for Les's news. Their motto is, "You'll never walk alone."
Mr Carlson: Herb, you're a married man.
Herb: It's not for me! I used Les's name. He's gonna take the girl out. See, pretty slick, huh? Huh? You see, this way, I can see if the girl's worth m-- Uh, what I mean is, if the client's happy, I'm happy and hey, Les gets something he hasn't had in two years. A date.
Herb: Our demographics says that single, lonely, depressed people listen to your broadcasts, and you're one of them!
Les: It's so cold, so inhuman!
Herb: Get with the twentieth century, Les!
Les: Herb, to me a person is more than some data on the computer printout sheet. I'm a complicated man! I need a complicated woman! And I'm willing to wait until fate takes a hand.
Herb: She also likes wimpy guys who wear glasses, and hog breeding.
Les: She does?
Les on the phone with Lorraine: Do you eat dinner?
Andy: Herbert, I do not need a computerized service to help me find girls. I meet 'em the old-fashioned way: I pick them up in bars.
Johnny to Jennifer: You don't mind if we just... stare at you?
Lorraine: Is this your first date with Carlson?
Jennifer: Oh, it's not a date. I work for him.
Lorraine: Full time?
Jennifer: Uh huh.
Lorraine: That's even better than this computer dating scam! I'm not complaining - it sure beats working the streets!
Les, seeing Lorraine: Ooooo!
Mr Carlson: Would you care to dance?
Jennifer: No, that's okay Mr Carlson.
Mr Carlson: No no, I've just got to get my shoes back on. Okay. Silly shiny little sissy shoes!
Jennifer: Do you know what this means?
Herb: Sure do. It means I wasted a $200 hooker on Nessman.
Les: Are you trying to tell me that I'm not worthy of Lorraine?
Jennifer: No, I'm trying to tell you that Lorraine is not worthy of you.
Les: She cost $200.
Jennifer: No, she charges $200. Les, I'm talking about the oldest profession.
Les: Lorraine's a farmer?
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